” Perplexed, Peter asked, “Previous life? What?”
As eccentric as that man sounded in that book I related with him.
While my friends were discussing why tumor cells do not get treated with medicines and what colour of piss you do when you suffer with hepatitis B, I didn’t for once doubt I had a disease any lesser than those.
I yelled, “Is this yours Sir? Sir?”
His beard was heavy and his mustache was touching his lips and every time he spoke, hair off his lips would move, it was funny, I thought I shouldn’t laugh, I shouldn’t stare at him,
“Yep, so where are you going?”
“I mean, who are you people, how do you get hold of the perfect one in one go, how do you guys do that, it’s so unfair, I’ve been crying and resenting and trying and fucking up things since forever, and you, you sir got it right in your first time.”
He relaxed knowing my topic of concern, he lifted his left leg and put it on his right, then, thought something, and altered it, puts the right on his left, and said,
His quirks were laughable, sympathetic, but I couldn’t stop myself from laughing.
“Smart man indeed.”
“Isn’t it beautiful?” I started.
“Beautiful, you like darkness, I’m a fan of clear skies and warm weather, but yes, scenic masterpiece, what a ride.”
He didn’t like it wholly, I was amazed, why didn’t he like it, he made it look average, how could he ruin my favorite thing in the world, he sounded so plain, it felt like he’s talking about geography. Well, in a way yes, but..
“Yes, I love this, I hold it not against you but I love this, the vivacious and the aura, oh my god, it’s heaven.”
“Heaven? What do you think heaven looks like?” his eyes twinkled like he wanted my opinion or was dying to say his.
“I don’t know, never thought about, actually do not believe in it, like a place you’d be rewarded if you do good deeds, so is any good deed is of any good, if it’s done thinking of a reward, it makes it sound everything so selfish, I do good for goodness and welfare, and not for fucking 72 virgins once I’m done doing my good karma.”
He looked offended, like I insulted him, his face turned red, but why would I ever be afraid of placing my opinion if my asked. He opened his top button, loosened his tie, took his two fingers and slid it once touching his neck, rounding it, and then began to say,
“You don’t know this world, you young people do not understand what’s it to find meaning of your life, and it’s all done by our allah, allah lays paths of your journey, you’re a traveller, just a traveller, not a builder, not a path maker for goddamn sake, you’re just a human being, this world is made by god, and he’s everywhere, he keeps an eye on you and you’re saying things like this, he shall punish you.”
His vanity had turned into agression and all was because I provoked him, I shouldn’t have done this, I felt scared sitting beside him, it felt awkward sitting beside a person so sensitive about the subjectivity of god, or of any topic, I wasn’t brought up this way, I was told to voice my views, I was told that others listen when you talk, and reason it, and I had never ever faced belief turning into faith turning into compulsion turning into enforcement turning into opression so quickly and not in front of my eyes within a matter of two seconds. I was entitled and he was arrogant and orthodox, we never could talk again. But I had to, I had to know what makes him such a strong believer.